Elder Spotlight

A recent visit was made to a very wonderful and well known couple in Akwesasne. Thomas V. and Toni Herne live in a nice quiet section off State Rt. 37. Vernie is more commonly known here by his middle name along with seven siblings and parents Katie and Tom Bones Herne. Toni was also blessed with seven siblings, but actually her mom gave birth to 15 in all, in which some babies did not survive. Up to the present, only Toni and Vernie remain from their families. Their children are Cathy, Angela, Joe, Tommy and Nancy. The only one who lives here is Joe with his family. The others live in other states with their spouses and children. Tommy lives in Brooklyn. In all, there are 11 grandchildren and 7 great-grands.

This couple had an interesting beginning to their lives together. When Toni came over from Italy as a young woman, she came over alone and not knowing English at all. She recalls the sight of about one thousand refugees being boarded at Naples on a boat coming to America. It took eight days to cross and she was so afraid, but so was everyone else, people of all ages. They landed at Ellis Island, NY and she remembers waiting for about another eight hours there before getting onto a bus that would take some to Rochester, NY. That was another long ride and soon she would meet up with her sisters that were waiting for her. They had come over previously and were already working and had an apartment. The year was 1955 and in July. So, once settled, she knew she had to find a job. Her sisters were a big help to her for sure. The first job she got was at a neck tie factory. She began to meet more people and one of them was Maggie Billings. Friends were made and her sisters made her feel right at home. Her sister had an apartment and in the basement, the girls had fun and lots of cooking too.

Vernie came into the picture at this point. He said he, along with others from Akwesasne, had been working in Niagara Falls at a power project. Usually after work when they were set to go home, Rochester became the halfway point to Akwesasne. Vernie said, "The guys and I would stop by to have coffee and check out the women," before coming home. Toni and Vernie laughed after he said that. There was a Cupid and her name was Maggie said Toni, and what eventually followed was a beautiful wedding. Some people from here were in this wedding such as Carol Terrance, Maggie Billings, Jackie Burnham, Jolene Mitchell and Buddy Bero. Vernie and Buddy still keep in touch with visits. This wedding took place on August 13, 1960. Toni said they stayed in Rochester for six years and moved back to Akwesasne to share their lives together.

Their first year of marriage was similar to other couples where the husband, Vernie, would go to work while Toni stayed at home in hopes that she could find work as well. His job was in Ellenburg working to build missile bases. There were seven bases in all and Ellenburg was the main site. He was on the concrete gang and sometimes they would be called to Vermont or the Adirondacks. Vernie remembered how it was a dangerous job with silos going 180 feet in the ground. "Sometimes the conditions were crazy," said Vernie. "We worked in pairs at the top so we spot each other. It was also frigid cold weather, usually below zero temps." It was very important to adhere to the safety rules. The missiles never had to be fired so eventually they were dismantled after a few years. At this time, Vernie gave us the pleasure of him serving in the US Postal Service for 34 yrs. and also became a SRC bus driver for 18 yrs.

While Toni was home, she became close friends to Shirley Gorrow and Delores Herne. They, with their husbands, all enjoyed many outings and events together. Three of the six are now deceased and missed by their friends very much. Toni said her and Delores used to bake cookies for their children or holidays, and the children still remember those delicious smells from the kitchen early in the morning. Another great memory for them was when the six of them would go and cut down Christmas trees for the family. People might not do that anymore.

Toni began to work at St. Regis Mohawk School as a daytime cleaner under the leadership of the late Buster Mitchell. We agreed during our visit that they were good years and strong friendships were built. She worked there for 18 years as well.

Vernie told stories about his youth sharing that his father was a blacksmith and tended to many customers who would stop by with their horse and buggy. He would fix them right up. Vernie especially enjoyed listening to the stories of these men and some he still remembers and still laughs about it.

Toni's father was a fruit grower in Italy and the family never went hungry because he worked hard to raise the family. She had so many memories of her young life and what her family had to endure during the breakout of the World War II. That was the reason for her and her family to have to move to America as refugees. Her story is deeper than that and very interesting, and sad many times during that period. In hearing her story, one that is imaginatively sad is when she spoke about her family she used to have. Now, she is the only one left and only has the memories of her parents, brothers and sisters. All had come to America. She said her and Vernie both are the only ones from their families left.

Well, Toni and Vernie's lives sound very happy together and they do everything together, that's for sure. "Vernie helps me with the flowers and I help him with the garden. During the summer we enjoy being outdoors. Since we have retired, we have traveled cross country twice in our van. We take turns watering the plants at the Senior Citizen Building. Throughout all our married years together, we always go to church with each other. We also belong to a world wide movement called Cursilo Movement. It is popular all over the world. We learn many teachings and one of many is the one that Vernie and I feel very important about is keeping a good marriage, which we have," said Toni.

They have been married for 55 years, proudly said by the couple. What a great example to others. They also spoke about the prayer group they belong to. When the first name of someone who is ill is shared, the group prays all together for that person to get well.

Their lives together are filled by the company of their children, grandchildren and the babies. The biggest holiday they share is Christmas with a huge meal as they follow the Christmas Eve Italian tradition of a dinner with mainly fish of many kinds. It is the tradition of the seven fish, a fast before a feast. In Italy, the eve is celebrated more than Christmas Day itself. Toni said, "In Italy there are no gifts but on January 6th they have the gift of Epiphany. No gifts, only a new dress to wear to church and a stocking to hang up.

What a nice story and how fortunate that Akwesasne knows such a beautiful couple who love each other. You both are a fine example to us all and to young people learning about life. Thank you both for the visit you shared and the story you both told. Sesi