Good bye my little one

By: Jheri White and Curtis White

I will not be there in the morning to wait for you to come into my room and say those awful words, “get up it is time for school.” I want you to be strong mom, and remember only peace in your heart and I will be with you forever.

Get up, your bus is here, did you get your lunch? Do not forget we are going to grandmas for dinner. Did you brush your teeth and your hair? I understand those words will never be spoken in your home, but I hope that I can bring peace into your heart. That when I speak those words, “I love you always and I will remember you, mother.”

I can only imagine that these are words from are young ones, “I feel so sorry that my mother has to go through this pain. My eyes are watering and I cannot see. I bought you the most beautiful present in the whole world and it is under the tree. Mom, be strong and I will look down and watch over you. Our Creator does some very awful things in our lives.”

We ask ourselves, “why my little one, they did nothing wrong?” My house will never be the same; I will not be able to cope with the loss. I hope my words make us all strong because we must be strong for all the mothers that have lost their child. Time heals all wounds, but it is the path to healing that is rough.

I heard that your child’s name will not be mentioned in the news and I am glad. I was taught when I was young that when we lose someone beautiful, we will not mention them with sad words because our sadness will not let them go. We will let their spirit continue on their journey to the spirit world. They would not be able to complete the journey and stand by the Creator if we hang on to them.

I was hurt very badly and I almost made that journey to the Creator, and when I woke I found out how beautiful life is. Your child will be remembered for only the awesome things of that morning walking out that door and telling you how much they love you. When you woke that beautiful child up that morning with love and gratitude, never feel sorry for the things that happened that day, we must go on that is what we taught them. When they were scared or had a bad dream that would keep them awake at night and you would have to hold them in your arms. My eyes are watering and this is too hard for me write. I have to go look at my children, I do not wish to be mean, I would like you to do the same, but I understand it cannot happen.

This morning my child will awake and ask, “Why are you outside making a fire?” I will tell my child that I do it for you and the mothers who have lost their child and won’t be able to see them until the parent passes over. The Creator I think says, “I will as the Creator to make them strong and overcome the pain of that awful day.” I send my words to you, the Creator. I will burn tobacco so you can understand the message of how much pain that massacre caused us. It has now given us the worry about sending our children to school every day.

For this is my message to you the mother of a child who has now crossed over from the land to the spirit world, be strong.