If a mom wrote fortunes…

Recently I went out to eat Chinese food. I always look forward to the prize part when you’re done your meal: your fortune cookie. I personally get a kick out of those little paper tidbits of wisdom. Sometimes they make no sense or are so vague they apply to everyone. Baby T’s dad didn’t have a fortune in his cookie that night which prompted the conversation about who gets to write those, and how do they come up with it. All because someone didn’t insert one into his cookie.

I was just doing laundry and found my little paper fortune and I thought about what if a mom wrote those fortunes. I doubt they would be fortunes.

1.) Curiosity kills boredom, go follow a four-year-old.

2.) You will find a bushel of money, but only when you clean your room.

3.) The night life is for you, unless you’re grounded

4.) You are free to invent your life, just ask Mom first.

5.) Your ability to juggle many tasks will take you far(for mom).

6.) If you wish for your child to listen, speak in a secretive whisper. If you wish for them NOT to listen say their name first. This will ensure lack of attention.

7.) When at a zoo, and you see a monkey with something in its hand, RUN!

8.) He who throws dirt, loses ground. And has to do the laundry.

9.) Hard work never killed anybody, just ask your grandmother.

10.) The next fortune cookie has a better fortune.

Alright, ten is the best I can come up with. That was way harder than I thought it would be. On second thought, people who write those fortunes must be pretty creative because I am yet to get the same fortune twice. As for the meaning, most of the fortunes someone had to come up with it from somewhere. But where?