A Voice from the Eastern Door
A Voice from the Eastern Door
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The boys have become increasingly independent over the last year, more so over the summer. It seemed the more time they spent at home with me or their father the more they yearned to go sleepover at a grandparents. We’ve been so busy the last few months that it was always faster to take the kids with us out shopping and out for errands. Eventually they started this barter system with us. Where one would say they would like to stay home instead of tag along. So one parent would stay home to give the road runners a break. There were times t...
Monday my boys and I both had a real day off. That is a rare thing and we were determined about taking full advantage. After all it was our only time where we didn’t have any place to be except with each other. We made plans to meet family over at the Mcmaze farm outside of Cornwall, Ontario. We got to the farm right before they opened so in the time it took us to get our gear the gates were open. The boys were all over the place. First it was all about the barn then it was off to the corn launcher. Once they ran out of corncobs to hurl we h...
There are many lessons you teach your children, some more frequently the others. Some arise all on their own without you having to facilitate an example. Others come from the world. We learn many lessons as moms too. When to pick your battles. When the fight is worth it and will pay off in the long run. I am still learning to be patient. I was never one of those, “let’s wait and see” type of people. I’m more of the “holy we’re late” types. When I had kids I quickly realized everything was on their time not mine. I had to learn to take a deep br...
The last few weeks have been so jam packed full of worry and hurt that it’s been practically impossible to sit down and write. Big brother went through a four day hospital stay, where for the first couple of days his diagnosis kept changing. I slept in that hospital with him. He was in a tremendous amount of pain. All I wanted was to take it away for him, to be the one who hurt instead of him. For a couple days before we brought him in he had painful abdominal pain each day right around supper time and be back to normal by morning. The first d...
After two weeks of my kids telling me that they do not want to play soccer, I had one tell me that he did want to. Of course he told me on the last day to register...and when I only had about fifteen minutes to get to Fort Covington. I quickly headed to my car and started the drive. Only thing was I forgot about Wade Lafrance road being closed. After a very nervous ten point turn I managed to get going back the direction I came from. I probably wouldn’t have wasted a whole two minutes turning around on the road if I was so scared of the deep d...
Little Brother has been working throughout the summer with his speech teacher. He wakes up early three days a week to ‘work’. We’ve seen such a tremendous change in the clarity and pronunciation of so many words that he has struggled with. It’s hard not to get choked up when I see him no longer having to work so hard. Sometimes I can’t, especially when I see him on the playground with kids who don’t know him, when they get him he lights up with pride. The last two years I watched him feel like he was different and shy away from making frie...
The biggest deal to the boys about summer vacation is being able to sleep in. They get to most of the time except the mornings that little brother has speech in the morning. That is a challenge because not only do I have to get one brother up but both, and Big Brother is so not a morning type of person. He counted down the days to the last day of school not because there was no more school but because he wanted to wake up when he felt like it, not have a schedule to keep. Imagine how disappointed he was when he found out that on some mornings...
One very important lesson we try to teach the boys is honesty. To always own up to their messes and be honest. We tell the boys that their word matters so much to us and that we want to know we can trust them when it comes down to them being able to tell us the truth. Even their little friends have learned that lying is not tolerated in our home. We explain that if we are told the truth we won’t get mad but will work with them to fix the situation. This week little brother proved himself a good student. The boys were outside playing when s...
This weekend’s trip took us to Boston. After the workday we got into our car and headed to St. Regis to pick up my mom. She had been patiently waiting for us to hit the road for an hour. Finally at 6 pm we were on our way out of town. We got as far as the eastern edge of the reservation when I remembered I had left my camera behind! We turned around and got it. By now it was 6:30 pm and we were finally headed to our destination. We watched the sunset on the NY-Vermont ferry. The boys were so amazed by how much the colors in the clouds c...
After a busy week we made plans to take the kids out to Stanley Island. We hadn’t been yet this year and the boys have been asking and begging to know exactly when we were going to go. I always look forward to seeing what interesting objects or toys the boys pack for the trip. When we told them we were going Friday after work they hooted and hollered like I said Christmas was happening tomorrow. They both packed. Surprisingly Big Brother didn’t even use his suitcase. His clothes all went into our bag. What Big Brother got together to bring was...
We had another weekend filled with kids and silly conversations. Friday night my little niece came over and filled our home with all her fabulous girly talk. I took the boys and her to the movies that night and she did not stop talking the entire ride up to Massena or back. During the movie she kept us giggling with her comments, “Ohh wait until u see this!” or “You’re not going to believe it!” because she had already watched the movie Monsters Inc. She was just so excited to have us see her favorite parts and was trying so hard to hold in a...
I see you, the mom with a carload of kids doing it on her own. I just want you to know you’re setting a great example of perseverance and determination to those kids you’re carting around. They know all that you do is out of the love you have for them. Actually we all see you and though we may never know how you manage to do it, we see you and think you are awesome. I just wish the smile I send your way could send that message. I see you, the tired mom who was up all night with a sick baby. I know it’s not easy to sleep sitting up in a rocking...
You know how as a mother you feel like a broken record? All the times you repeat yourself. I am endlessly saying, “no don’t do that” and then “ok it’s time to do this.” If I had to actually add up every time I said certain phrases I’m sure it would be in the thousands. I receive mean looks in the grocery store when someone sees my 4 year old sitting on the floor in a time out. I don’t care where, who or how come, a stranger may think I’m ridiculous for publicly enforcing rules. By five Big Brother was excellent and no longer needed a hundred...
After years of the kids begging for a puppy we finally got one. It was a surprise addition that neither myself or my husband could have foreseen. We had a wild weekend sleepover that included four cousins coming to our house to hang out with the brothers. The following afternoon we took two of the cousins home to their totas and were met with the cutest puppy we had ever seen. The cousins called him tiny and it was obvious why. My kids always see puppies they want but we tell them, “not yet” or “we’re looking for this kind of pet.” I just abou...
As the boys grew from babies into boys, the sort of things I stumbled across in daily life has changed. In the beginning of their little lives it was a pacifier under a couch or a baby sock in a cupboard. Things that would go missing were baby bottle caps and wipe cases. Now that I have these big boys, I am always surprised by their hiding spots and the vast array of hidden objects. This week I found actual gravel in the bathtub. I am used to a ring of dirt after their bath. I expect it because they gravitate towards dirt and are professional r...
As Little brother’s speech has become clearer his confidence has been on the rise. He has started to come out of his shell and ask for friends to come hang out. Before it was Big Brother’s buddies who would take him in under their wing. He has even begun to make plans with his buddies from Headstart. It is such a drastic change from the start of the school year when he was the one student playing alone while all the rest grouped together. He knew they couldn’t understand all his words so he didn’t want them to point it out. Three and a half ye...
After work on Friday my niece came to visit. She always makes me laugh with her girliness. It’s been a while since she’s slept over and I got a big dose of all the things my boys don’t like but I do. It really got me thinking about how different it must be to have a daughter. She’s a fabulous shopping buddy. She loves the color purple, horses, Hello Kitty and babies. She will talk to me like I’m the coolest person she knows, such a big difference from the boys who tune their mom out. She spends a good deal of our hangouts trying to convince...
Big Brother has always needed a push when it comes to trying new things or venturing off by himself. Many a time I have seen his brown eyes look to me and when we make eye contact he takes a big breath and works through it. Little Brother seeing this in certain scenarios will then insist on having me right there. Now I know Little Brother isn’t the least bit shy, it is all an act. I do see his reasoning, and in an effort to keep things fair I make sure I am there for him too. It’s not the reassurance that Little Brother craves but the pre...
After being in complete awe at how well my kids have gotten along, I was thrown for a loop with Little Brother. He has these ninja turtles that he plays with and last night he lost something that goes to them. If you don’t live in boy world, they’re little action figures with their own weapons and there are even other characters you can get like villains for the good ones to fight with. When I find a little sword or numchucks I stick them into the Ninja Turtles van. I always do because I don’t want to vacuum them up or deal with Little Broth...
This week Big Brother has taken on a sweet mentoring role with Little Brother. They are hanging out every waking moment except when they are in school. In the morning Big Brother has taken pride in saying, “Come on I’ll help you”, to Little Brother in matters such as brushing his teeth or looking for a lost toy. I’m still on hand in there but I love that Big Brother offers. I never wanted either of my kids to feel responsible for the other and it is nice to see how their relationship has evolved into what it is lately. Little Brother has alw...
I have come to expect the unexpected. To be ready for plans to fall apart. Prepared that my kids will find ways to outsmart me. Surprises such as candy wrappers in my shoes and laundry stuffed in the couch are things I am used to. I am not used to the boys cleaning their rooms without me bugging them one way or another. I am not used to toilet seats up or laundry that actually makes it into the laundry basket. Now imagine a day that I didn’t have to annoy big brother awake or fight to get teeth brushed. It’s so rare in our house that I alm...
We’ve all heard of Murphy’s Law and I even once wrote about how it directly affects moms. Well I’m just going to go and name things I think fall under Mom law; things that happen, or seem to happen, to mostly us moms. My favorite is when you get a baby ready in a snowsuit and are walking to the car when they poop up to their necks. Last week I took some time off from work to have a break and get some projects done. Well, I ended up with barely enough time to take a shower. Little Brother became sick with this crazy weather. It’s spring! It’s wi...
There is nothing that gets my kids off track like long weekends and school vacations. Little Brother went back to school this week with such a fight that I feared the future years of dragging him to the bus stop. All last week his school was closed for parent teacher conferences and Thanksgiving break. But he actually had an even longer break because we had to go to Ottawa for a doctor’s appointment the Friday before. So for ten whole days he was stuck to his mom again. When Monday rolled around he cried and begged to stay home “One mo’ day m...
Every mother says her kids are growing up too fast. It’s not just a saying. You feel it, you really look at how big your kid is getting and your heart aches remembering the small bundle you started off with. How dependent and helpless a baby is when they come into the world quickly vanishes. I still find it hard to believe how tall, independent, and helpful Big Brother has become. Lately I find myself being caught off guard when Little Brother masters something new. Today he learned how to use a fork. We’ve had the little plastics ones for as...
This week I was trying to piece together Little Brother’s baby book. I thought about Big Brother’s baby book and how writing about what the kids do weekly kind of helps out in the memories department. If I ever forget what happened when, due to aging, the column is my own little timeline. It got me thinking about how long it’s been. I mean I miss a week here or there for various reasons but it has been over four years since I began this column. This month Little Brother is the exact age that Big Brother was when this column was created. That...
